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The no contact rule used correctly is one of the most powerful things you can actually do, but if used incorrectly, it actually reverts back and has the opposite effect of what you want.
So in this video, I’m gonna show you the three ways that most people use the contact rule incorrectly. And I’m gonna show you how to not make that same mistake, so that you’ll end up like doing the opposite of what your intention is.
Now the first thing to understand about this is you might be asking yourself, what is the no contact rule, or can you clarify it for me?
The no contact rule is generally known if you’re moving out of a relationship and your intention is to either get over somebody, or your intention is to get them back, which very often is the intention, the reason people are doing the no contact rule isn’t just to get over them.
It’s to actually get them to come back, and it can have that effect. It can have the effect of either helping you move on, or it can have the effect of actually as you move on and as you bring your energy back, there’s an attraction that comes back for the other person.
However, so what does the no contact rule mean? The no contact rule means specifically what it says. It means you don’t contact. You don’t contact. You don’t call ’em, you don’t text them, you don’t see them.
The urges you have sometimes when after you’ve had maybe a little glass of wine and you’re like, “Oh, let me see how they’re doing. “I’m just gonna say I miss you,” or something like that, that ends up reopening back up the loop, and that is not actually no contact.
No contact is simply not contacting them by talking to ’em on the phone, seeing them in person, accidentally running into them, and really just bringing your energy back 100%.
Now, a lot of times I’ve made videos on the no contact rule before, and many times what people do is they are using the no contact rule as a modality towards getting their ex back.
Now the reason this can work is because when you energetically bring your energy back and you start focusing on being the star of your own movie, there is an effect where somebody else will feel that you are more so pulling your energy back from them.
Now think about this. Moving out of the relationship that you may have moved out of, what ended up happening is when you moved out of the…
When you were getting close to this person, this person then probably said that they wanted space. They wanted some type of energetic space. They wanted time to like focus on their own things. And what a lot of times will happen is when somebody says, “I want space,” the other person then gets in a way a little bit anxious saying, “Well, why do you want space?
“Is there something wrong with me? “Is there something I’m not doing right? “Let me fix it.
“Let me help you.” And then they lean in even more, and then they try to fix.
And then the person says even more, “Okay, now I want even a little bit more space” to where they’re almost out of the frame. However, what ends up happening is it has the opposite effect.
Now, the thing to understand about the no contact rule is if they want space, give them space, because in the space, they can then in a way bring their energy back to themselves.
Then they may actually realize that they do still have feelings for you. However, if you don’t give them space, they can’t come to that remembrance within themselves. So the key is to understand the power of space and also the power of space in your own life.
Times in the past when I had challenges with this, what I had to learn is that a lot of times I was making somebody else the star of my movie instead of being the star of my own movie.
I’ve seen it happen so many times where people go through a breakup, they bring the energy back to themselves. They start focusing on their own passions.
They start hanging around their own friends. They start focusing their own family. And what ends up happening is they start loving their life.
And then as they start loving their life and as they start feeling better, people may actually come back, because there is a very strong reflection that we get based on the energy that we are embodying.
It is crazy how this works. I’ve seen it happen so many times and even different ways, not even just in love dynamics, even in friendships dynamics where I could feel that maybe a friend was going through a hard time.
And then this person would then have like more and more things come up with more and more people in the friend group, because it’s like the energy then almost like links up energetically to everybody else that sparks that kind of situation.
So the no contact rule is bringing the energy back to you. Now, a lot of times what happens when people are doing the no contact rule.